I have a feeling that somewhere I'll see things like they are, but they keep fading away. To be reaching out is like dream you've been seeing from past. They are there, waiting to be claimed. I wish things would be simple as they were when we we're young. Now everything is building up into bigger mess then we expected. I may be selfish for wishing things for myself, that I'd see what I want.

I hope there will be the day when you could just turn around and wave at those who were left behind by doing so, like telling that once you will get to finish line you'll go back for them. I wish that would really happen.

Well here I have a friend, which was totally undecided about his love life. Well mostly his friends were usually sweethearts... something like that I guess. Anyways he recently had fallen for someone from his work but, yeah there's always a but in it. Well but she is already in relationship which is not looking to bright - so he says. He told me that they are spending much time together since they work at the same place, some bar I think. Well however she is totally liking him and saying to him sweet things and such. The funny thing about it is her boyfriend, he actually came to visit her at her work with his friends, acting all cool and bad ass + this guy, mny friend was there too, waiting for her to finish. She started to get annoyed by her own boyfriend and spend time with these friend of mine which had came at work just for her and probably cuse he was bored. I dunno but are all guys like that? Cuse you're bored? Haha...
The very next day, her boyfriend send her message how much he loves her and sweet talk like he's something romantic or something. But the day before he came with his buds being all cool and spying on her for whole evening, checking what my friend and her would be doing. BAAN!


 
Jealousy is a b*t?h lol I had some extreme cases of such phenomena, but its hard if you really feel for both people, well its always smart to decide for the one that makes you happy not for someone who makes you angry or sad all the time then saying: I love you.

I gave her addvice that she should start looking whats the best for her and whats the point in being in such relationship. Also I said to him that I know whats he doing, its that puppy love, that thrill that you feel wanted and all nice, but its WRONG! Don't mess with peoples feelings if you don't really mean it! It HURTS!

Thats all from me for now...
Bie bie~

Ever consider yourself how useful are you in some society that you're in?

Well I did and most some friends i have are also dealing with this questions... But really why are we even trying? Maybe to pleasure the ones we care for the most, or maybe just finding our place to be, you know like searching yourself and so...



When I started to think what is the reason behind it, I realised that actually... its preaty easy to define this phenomena. Calling it selfish... jeah as weird as it may sound, this is act of being pleased with yourself because happiness of others makes you happy no matter what thing you do. Some will go far to achive happiness of certain people, some even too far in sacrifying something while doing so but in the end its that feeling that makes use complete when we see faces and reaction of others how pleased they are with us. Isn't it funny how world spins around and give us everything twice as back as we do...

I've been trying to be useful to my friends but instead of making something good for them I probably did something great with was good only at the time but... in long terms my actions weren't really for them... altho they've chose it themselves so the decisions they've made were their own ^^

Help is not always good thing to do.